Am I Ready?
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
I went to my 38 week appointment this afternoon thinking, "Gee, I'm so close to having this baby. What's the point of monitoring anymore?". After ten minutes, the nurse came in, looked at my paper, and says, "Hmmm... I'll be back.". So, I looked at it more closely and could see that the baby's heart rate had dropped several times. The doctor sent me over to labor and delivery for further monitoring. The baby's heart rate dropped again, so the moved up my c-section date to tomorrow. I tried to talk her into Friday (long story), but she didn't feel comfortable waiting that long.
I'm mostly ready. I have all the baby "stuff" I need and it's all washed and set up. As uncomfortable as I am, I'm just not sure I'm ready to never be pregnant ever again in my life. I mean, is this "it"? Am I moving onto a different chapter in life? I know it's unlikely I will talk hubby into more children and I'm just feeling sentimental about pregnancy and this stage in my life. But, I did a belly cast and had professional photos taken to help make the experience more memorable. Is there anything else I need to do before I go down to labor and delivery tomorrow morning?
It just seems a bit unreal. That's how it was last time. In fact, I knew I was having a baby, but when they plopped that new little life on my chest and she was so big and fully developed, I just couldn't believe it. Somehow I thought I'd feel different this time. But I don't. It still seems surreal and I think I'm going to be quite surprised to find that I have another little baby tomorrow. I'm suddenly nervous about juggling two and helping Lilly make the adjustment without feeling left out.
posted by Avorie @ 6:57 PM,
2 Comments:
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At 10:43 PM,
Amanda and Tim said...
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Oh I hope everything goes/went ok (not sure about the time difference between us and when you'll receive this). Thinking of you all as the new addition to the family arrives x
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At 10:43 PM,
Reesh said...
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Oh wow! You are going to do great. These are just the jitters you get just before you become a mom for the first, second or even third time. Perfectly normal and I'm sure you will adjust wonderfully. Well, it takes a little bit of time, but before you know it it will feel like you've always had 2 children to love and care for. Good luck, see you on the other side!
